And continuing on….
The last time I wrote with any kind of regularity, it was when Theresa was in California. I was 10 pounds lighter (workin’ on losing the gut as we speak). Blogger didn’t have the weird interface with the blue everywere and holy-moly-a-spell-check function. Blogger wasn’t owned by Google.
I was still in shock from everything. My group of friends were going through a period of hostility stemming from various reasons. I found that I needed to grow up quickly.
I stopped writing. I stopped enjoying life. I stopped keeping in touch with a lot of people. At the lowest point, every weekend was an exercise in how much more I could hate life and the things that life contained. I was trying to get by in school by taking out loans, working part-time at work, and doing well in neither. Life was shitty.
But slowly, things got better and better. My relationship with my girlfriend got a lot better– I suppose we both grew up and learned much. My parents got separated, my grandparents took some pity on me and finally lived up to some of their long neglected promises. Now I’m writing this, without a job, and for the first time in two and a half years, not needing one.
This year I’m going to find myself again. I’m going to try and write as much as I can. I’m going to go to school and go to the majority of my classes and actually try. I’m going to work on things that interest me. I’m going to talk to some people I used to, do graphic projects that i’m actually interested in. I’m going to glowstick and dance again and work on my site. I’m going to take more pictures and be artsy in a non-pretentious way.
I found that as I grow up, my friends grew up too. They are going through their own special individual things and I wish them the best. I’m finally kind of content at the moment, and I hope that this is the end of the storm and not just the center of the huricane.
In a few weeks I will be purchasing my own dedicated server for Glowsticking.com. I will also have the ability to host as many domains and people as I need. So for those of you bloggers who know me, ask me about it.
